5 Coffee Shop Behaviors an Etiquette Expert Wants You to Stop Immediately
Think your coffee shop habits are harmless? An etiquette expert reveals five surprisingly common behaviors that frustrate baristas and fellow customers alike.
Think Coffee Shops Are Just Like Home? Think Again
There is something undeniably comforting about settling into a coffee shop — the ambient noise, the smell of fresh espresso, the sense that you can stay as long as you like. But according to one leading etiquette expert, that sense of comfort may be causing customers to forget something important: coffee shops are shared public spaces, not personal retreats.
"Coffee shops may feel like our living rooms, but they're really shared living rooms — and shared spaces work best when everyone remembers their manners," said Lisa Mirza Grotts, a California-based etiquette expert who spoke with Fox News Digital on the topic.
In a recent blog post, Grotts pointed out that even customers with the best intentions regularly break unwritten social rules without ever realizing it. "Public spaces require extra awareness," she noted. Below, she outlines five habits that customers should drop — starting today.
1. Showing Up at the Counter Completely Unprepared
If you have ever shuffled up to the register and then stared blankly at the menu for two full minutes, you are not alone — but you are also not doing anyone any favors.
Grotts recommends deciding on your drink, including size and any customizations, well before you reach the counter. She suggests following what she calls the "three P's": be prepared, present, and polite.
"Know what you want before you reach the counter, put your phone away — unless you are using it to pay — make eye contact, and say 'please' and 'thank you,'" she advised. A little preparation goes a long way toward keeping the line moving and the atmosphere pleasant for everyone involved.
2. Staying Glued to Your Phone While Ordering
Ordering while scrolling through your phone is one of the most common — and most disruptive — things a coffee shop customer can do.
"Coffee shops operate on flow," Grotts explained. "When one customer hesitates at the counter, it disrupts the rhythm for everyone behind them. A moment of awareness keeps the line — and the mood — moving."
She emphasized that good manners ultimately come down to awareness: recognizing that baristas are working hard and that other customers are patiently waiting their turn. Putting the phone away for sixty seconds is a small act that makes a significant difference.
3. Treating the Café Like a Private Office
With remote work now a permanent fixture of modern life, coffee shops have become de facto offices for millions of people. But Grotts warns against taking that too far.
"Shared spaces come with shared responsibility," she said. "Clean up after yourself, keep conversations at a reasonable volume, and treat staff respectfully. These small behaviors show that you recognize you are part of a community — not the only person in the room."
Spreading your belongings across multiple tables, taking loud phone calls, or leaving a mess behind are all behaviors that signal a lack of consideration for those around you.
4. Placing an Overly Complicated Order During a Rush
Customizable drinks have become a defining feature of modern coffee culture, and there is nothing inherently wrong with knowing exactly how you like your latte. However, Grotts says that timing and situational awareness should guide just how elaborate your order gets.
"Etiquette is really about reading the room and recognizing that your choices affect other people's time," she said. "If the line is long, keeping your order simple is thoughtful — especially if you are ordering something you get regularly."
Saving your most intricate, twelve-modifier drink order for a quiet Tuesday morning is a small courtesy that the people behind you — and the barista — will quietly appreciate.
5. Camping Out Without Making a Purchase
Perhaps the most contentious coffee shop habit of all is lingering for hours on a single cup — or worse, nothing at all.
"It is rude when a café becomes a rent-free workspace," Grotts said bluntly. "The unspoken agreement is simple: you purchase, they welcome you. You linger, you replenish. Repeat as needed."
Her practical guideline: order something when you first arrive, and plan to make an additional purchase roughly every hour you stay. During peak hours, be willing to give up your seat if the café is crowded and other paying customers need space.
The Bottom Line
None of these behaviors require a major lifestyle overhaul — they simply require a little more consideration for the people sharing the space around you.
"In the end, good manners aren't about rules — they're about respect," Grotts concluded.
Next time you step into your favorite coffee spot, take a moment to be prepared, stay off your phone, tidy up after yourself, keep your order reasonable when others are waiting, and make sure your purchases reflect the time you spend there. Both the staff and your fellow customers will thank you for it.
